Cheating girlfriend wants me back reddit

Posted on 01.12.2020 Comments

I cheated.

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The affair is over but my husband just found out and is very angry and wants me to move out. I want to work on our marriage to see if we can stay together and be happy. Not sure if it will turn out that way but think we owe it to ourselves and our 3 children ages But at the moment, he is very angry and understandably so.

My main concern right now is my 3 children and custody if we are not able to work out our marriage and divorce is where we find ourselves. In a fit of anger this evening, my husband said that in no uncertain terms, he wants me to move out, we ARE getting a divorce and he wants full custody of the children.

I always heard the woman should never leave the home because of how it is perceived by the courts. And I am sure my infidelity will not help my case either. Bottom line question And if he is insistent and I don't want to move out, is there any legal action that he can take to make that happen?

If your husband is this dead set on a divorce, and doesn't want to work on the marriage, tell him to move out. Sorry I know other people think you're a bad person for the infidelity. Frankly that's a non-issue.

cheating girlfriend wants me back reddit

The affair is over and your husband isn't focusing on the marriage and your family. He's focusing on his anger, ego and dramas. Yes he has a right to be angry. But before he puts it all on you, he better start looking at himself in the mirror. Affairs happen for all sorts of reasons. A few of them are good reasons, the rest are so-so at best.

The reality is, if the affair happened its more likely than not, that its because there was pathology in your marriage before the affair started. And it takes 2 to mess up a marriage. Frankly, in my experience, most affairs happen when someone has already mentally checked out of the marriage. It isn't always the cheating spouse. Sometimes its the betrayed spouse who checked out first.

Conflict or anger itself does not have to cause an irreparable rift between partners.I held my cool until we left. He had moved ahead of us, and he chose to wait until we were miles from home, about halfway there. This was after I had resigned my job, given up our apartment, packed a truck that my mom and dad were driving and become certified to teach in another state. I had the dog, cat, two mice and my child in my car.

We turned around and went back after he told me. He left me with an incredible amount of debt and a great deal of heartache. The doors close on the plane and that was a really fun 10 hours. It turns out he was just selfish. She was also a close friend. It has destroyed me. I also knew that said friend was trying to sell his house, so I called the real estate agent and asked the see his place.

Right inside the front door, I recognized one of her jackets hanging in the mud room. I proceeded to the living room and bam … right on the mantel was a picture of my wife and this guy.

We divorced shortly after. She ended up marrying this guy … then cheated on him … and now they are divorced. Sure enough, it was her, and she had an active relationship going on with someone else. I had to stay home and babysit our five-year-old son. I figured my wife would go and then come home early. She was with her boss at his apartment. I had been at a pub just down the road and decided to surprise her when she got back.

I rang her up. I was still friends with his siblings and parents, and they were tagged in some photos of him. They were holding his clearly to-term newborn son … less than nine months after I broke up with him.I'VE been ith my wife for 25 years and last year I found out she had been cheating. She'd been having an affair with a man she met on the Internet. We have three children. The youngest is at university. I believed her when she said she was staying over at her sister's when, in fact, she was meeting him.

She begged for my forgiveness and I tried to put what happened to one side but I soon discovered our relationship could never be the same again, so I asked a solicitor to set the wheels in motion for a divorce.

On the day I told her, she threatened to kill herself. She keeps telling me she will do it unless I take her back. I'm certain I want a divorce and I don't want to be held hostage by her threats. But I'm frightened. What if she did kill herself? SHE'S making herself into the victim when she has only herself to blame for the mess she's in.

But it's clear she isn't coping well with the fallout from her affair and your reaction. She's in a state of shock. This wasn't supposed to happen. You were supposed to forgive her.

After all the tears, begging and pleading, she resorted to emotional blackmail to try to manipulate you. Emotional blackmail is a form of bullying and it's wrong. You can't stay in the relationship for fear of what she might do to herself. You're not responsible for keeping her alive.

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She's responsible for her feelings and actions. Nor should you stay out of sympathy. Good relationships are based on mutual respect and it seems you've lost all respect for her. But, for the sake of your children, you could offer some positive support to help her move on to a life without you.

You could both enter counselling to help each of you in the transition from cohabitation to separation.

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Do you think she might agree? Even if she doesn't, it would be good for you to rationalise your feelings with an impartial listener. If you have any lingering doubts about ending the marriage, you can explore them in counselling to be sure feelings of shame, humiliation and anger aren't driving your actions.

By Mirror. Don't miss Coleen's weekly email newsletter Sign up When you subscribe we will use the information you provide to send you these newsletters.My girlfriend and I were going out for 1 year already. Things were going great until yesterday, when her friend told me that my girlfriend was seeing this guy for 2 months. What's worse, my girlfriend was cheating on me on our anniversary.

When I asked her why she cheated, she simply says "His face lit up, I couldn't say no". She keeps on asking me to take her back but I am not sure I can trust her anymore. She even went down on her knees and sobbed in my arms.

I told her that I would think about it. That night, I could barely sleep. Igonore the tears, whenever a woman gets caught they know all's they have to do is turn on the water works and a lot of guys will fold and forgive them but all you are doing if you take her back is telling her that whenever she cheats on you in future, all she has to do is turn the tears on and you will take her back.

cheating girlfriend wants me back reddit

And look at her excuse - thats got to be the crappest excuse for cheating i've ever heard and did she really need to keep it going for two months??? She been ncaught this time, how many times she done it that you don't know about? You would have to be ready to forgive and forget.

If you can't do that, the relationship will be very difficult.

Dumped cheating girlfriend wants boyfriend back

When you are intimate, you will think about the other guy. When she goes out with friends you will wonder and worry. It's hard to go back into a relationship where a partner has cheated. In my opinion I'd say forget her and get you a girl that knows how to treat you right. She may of meant the world to you but shes just using you man!

I wouldn't take her back, good on you, if you really meant that much to her, then she wouldn't be with other men would she! I know it's hard man, but seriously, you made the right choice, shes pissed because she broke up with the other guy, now shes coming crying to you! She saw you as an easy option and will only use you till she finds someone else and does it again!

The first step in getting back with your ex is understanding why the heck you broke up in the first place. Believe it or not, some people are clueless when it comes to this one thing.

My girlfriend cheated on me and wants me back. What should I do?

And the reason they're clueless is because it is so hard to look at yourself and your own faults. Everything that goes wrong in a relationship is always the other person's fault.

We're perfect. It's they who screwed up. Well, news flash Nobody is perfect. So the first thing you need to do is objectively look at why the relationship went sour. On the next page you will find a set of techniques that are guaranteed to make your ex come begging you to take them back. If you want to know how to get ex back then I strongly recommend that you to read everything on the next page before it's too late.

Once question that most people ask when they are on the wrong side of a break up is "why? Instead of wasting your time figuring out the reason why it was you on the wrong side, you should be concentrating on how it is you are going to get your ex to come running back to you.

Here are 3 dirty little tricks they will never see coming and put the advantage back in your court. Write them a quick letter and tell them you agree with the break up. Yea, I know it sounds crazy, but it works.Dear Chump Lady. You had tried reconciliation with your ex, and up until recently I too had hoped for that. In fact, three or so weeks ago she called me in tears asking to come back home.

This was five days before her scheduled move-in date with her affair partner APand she tells me that up until then, moving in with him seemed like an abstract thing.

The apartment was beyond their means, in fact she was the one who had to get the cash advance on her credit card to move in. My gut tells me that sometime soon she may try to come crawling back. My wife is a gym rat, in great shape. Thing is, having my daughter pulls at me. I think about her having her family back. What was it that made you decide to give your husband another try?

And how should I respond to my wife if and when she asks to return? In my heart I know I need to move on without her, and I want to be strong, not show any weakness and say the right things to her.

How is she enjoying the theoretical debt she is incurring? Are they imaginary numbers? And sleep apnea machine? She leaves you, then says she wants back. Try harder to win back the wonderfulness that is her. No, she moves in with him for the stated reason…. That howler had to come from her, right?

The deep thing she feels for you is in your back pocket, where you keep your wallet.

cheating girlfriend wants me back reddit

She wants to keep you as the Mr. Fall Back Plan and the personal financier of her fuck ups. My next thought is, it sounds like she moved out, so I hope you have her for abandonment of the home and your daughter. Please solidify your position. Keep her out the home.

Dear Chump Lady, My cheating wife wants to come back

Her problems with the AP financial, penile, and otherwise are not your concern. They are her karma.

cheating girlfriend wants me back reddit

You asked: What was it that made you decide to give your husband another try?My wife and I have been separated for almost 7 months now. It was her who wanted it, and I spent the first 3 months grieving heavily.

Earlier this year I finally accepted it was over and I moved on in my head and emotionally. I let go. We have 2 children aged 10 and 8. Issues leading to separation were control and mistrust issues on my part, which I believe are no longer issues for me - but leading to several affairs on her part. She is diagnosed with depersonalisation disorder and bipolar. Both of us have done and are doing major life changing work on these areas of ourselves so that no matter what the future holds, we are better people.

Three weeks ago I met someone else and went out on a date. After saying she didn't mind, my ex freaked out and now says she wants me back and realizes what she is losing.

Our marriage has been rocky for years and both of us have been working on personal issues with therapists since we separated.

Parents, How Did Your Kid's BF/GF Win You Over? (Reddit Stories r/AskReddit)

She said before we separated, that she has wanted separation for years and no longer felt anything toward me. Now I have met a lovely new woman who really sees me for who I am, my wife seems to have had a significant change of heart toward me, caused by her realising that I have started to move on, after I initially never wanted to separate.

We have remained friends and have both learned alot about ourselves and I never intended to go out and meet someone, it happened through work. Has my wife really had a change of heart or does she not want me nor want anyone else to have me. Neither do I want to hurt the new woman I have just met who has been very understanding, though it's new and I am aware of the euphoria that can cloud judgement on a new romance.

Both my wife and I have been lonely and sad for years married for 16and have tried unsuccessfully to make it work, but do I give it one last shot, believing that we can be happy, losing the new friend I have found, but re-newing my marriage or possibly finding its still the samedo I continue moving on without my wife, or do I put the whole lot on hold until I know what is going on in my own head and heart some more.

I can tell you from personal experience that you hit the nail on the head. She doesn't want you but she doesn't want anyone else to have you either. I've dealt with this from several men I've dated and my female friends that as soon as they think their ex is happy they try to yank you back.

Let me tell you something you gave it a good effort for 16 years and you had every right not trust her because what point don't you understand she "cheated" not once but several times.

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It is not likely she's turned into Mary Poppins. It doesn't matter if you and your new lady friend work out or not the point is your ex is only trying to reel you back in because she was sure you'd be lonely and miserable.

Well guess what you got past it and moved on with your life so save yourself a lot of heartache or the chance of confusing and hurting the kids trying to mend the fence with their Mom because it will only make it harder to.

You may be wondering how to get your ex back when ex has a new friend if you're still crazy about them. Is there anything more difficult than seeing the ex you still love with another people? It's emotional torture and for many people it's something they have to deal with on a daily basis.

Wanting ex back after the break up is one thing but when they already moved on and is dating someone new, it becomes a much more challenging situation. There is a right way and a wrong way to handle a situation like this if your goal is to get back together with ex. Understanding the steps you need to take and what you have to avoid at all costs, will allow you to have the best chance of becoming the person loves again. You're only shot at getting your ex back is to follow the right steps that will make her ask you to get back together.

Maybe if you broke up with her, then you might be able to be the one who brings up the subject of getting back together. But if you can do it without, it would be much better. But how do you get someone back without seeming desperate? In order to get your ex girlfriend attention, you have to show value without telegraphing your interest in her, while at the same time initiating interaction. So don't ignore your ex texts and calls when they break up with you. It screams that you are so devastated by the breakup that you can't even handle talking to her.

You want to respond to her, but do it in the right way.I was married for10 years then my wife connected with an ex on Facebook. She left me for him and and now wants me back. When they were last together, he cheated on her many times and got another girl pregnant. She loved him back then but broke up with him over this but went back to him 20 years later thinking he grew up. He's still the same womanizing creep he was then, and she wants me to give her another chance.

Her mother, whom I'm still friends with, has disowned her as has much of her extended family because she has an aunt who was married to a cheater. Her mom would like me to give her another chance and hopefully heal the family, but I'm not sure.

I've also started seeing someone I've known for a long time who lost her long marriage due to her husband sneaking around with his Facebook ex.

I still have feelings for my exwife, but don't know if I could rebuild the trust we once had and the new lady I'm seeing is someone I can see myself with long term.

Not sure what to do and need guidance. She is been with you 10 freaking years and left you for her ex without any regret!? That tells me she never loved you! I guarantee, If you take her back she will leave you again, because she is confused about what she wants! I had a friend of mine married to this girl for 5 years. So she came back after 1 year and he forgave her and took her back. Stayed with him for 6 months! He moved on and never took her back. Lesson learned! I am telling you dude.

DO NOT take her back! If you take her back she will leave you again for that man. And will think of you as her backup plan! No matter how much you love or like her, it doesnt matter. Its about how much she likes you and in your case she doesnt, probably she never have!. Otherwise she wouldn't leave a man she is been married to for 10 years! I agree with most of what you say but we don't know if she ever loved him.

I'm guessing she did at one point but then changed like so many people do. My girlfriend cheated on me she said she fell out of love for a second. Then when she wanted back I said why you don't love me and she said I fell in love with you once it will happen again. What a bunch of horse shxt. If she really loved me she wouldn't have cheated. I should have said look how easy you fell out what is to stop that again but didn't. She just can't make up her mind like many people.

I think people make mistakes, at the time they're like this is better but then later they see it isn't. I did ask her what is to stop her from cheating again and she said IT WON'T, like that is some sort of guarantee, funny but sad.

Can people change, I think some can but I think the odds are when somebody cheats and gets away with it how can they not think they forgave me before so I can do it again. That really applies to selfish people.

My girl is Narcissitic Personality Disorder, she would never admit it but she sure is. I hate the idea of losing my girl but I think everyday what is really going to change with her, it's better to get the pain over now than more ups and downs and heartbreak in the future. My girl is very good looking and she knows it, she has bragged to me that she can get any guy she wants, I don't know about that because she does have 2 young kids, if she didn't have kids I would say yes but because of her looks it has made her a bad person.